Can autistic people have normal lives?
Thomas Gisler, I was diagnosed 2/2018 at age 59
Answered Jul 7
https://www.quora.com/#
Originally Answered:
Can someone with autism live a normal life?
Ahhhhh! - here I go again… on my SOAP BOX!!! Those who have followed me know that I have a strong belief in why Autism is perceived as it is..
First off - I want to clarify that my comments are taken from my perspective of being autistic and that I have not had to struggle with very the extreme traits that some with autism do. I have been fortunate to have learned how to manage my traits well enough to be independent though it has not been an easy task.
This is where I get on my soap-box again. It is my firm belief that there is a grave misunderstanding of what Autism is by BOTH the neurotypical and autistic ( Neurodiverse) communities I'll refer to each community as ND and NT)
I go back to emphasizing the importance of understanding what it means to be neurologically different. This is deeper than differences in personalities. A neurological difference is THE foundation of our life experience and defines everything aspect of our biological being. How our bodies and mind respond chemically to stimulus. How our minds retain and manage information, our physical and psychological needs, and even perception itself. THIS is the profound difference need to acknowledge when we talk about two groups that are neurologically different.
So, what does this all have to do with the question? I’m not sure if the person asking this question is ND or NT. This does change the intent of the question.
What is a “normal life”? What are we using to measure or compare a life to, so we can determine if it is “normal”? If you are NT and using your life, then all autistic people are “abnormal”. Because as I stated on my soap-box, we are PROFOUNDLY different. So different there is a Neurotypical “normal” and an autistic “normal”. They are not the same normal, but they both are normal for each type neurology.
Since my diagnosis, I have stopped trying to be what I
thought was my normal.. I stopped trying to act, to think, to talk, to socialize, to share the same interests, as those who are neurotypical. All that time, I was suppressing my true feelings: My autistic normal.
Can someone autitic live a normal life? I say yes, if they are trying to live true to their autistic nature. Meeting their autistic needs. Solving autitic problems with autistic solutions and so on.. This is our autitic normal and this is the only thing we can be.. is who we are.
If the question is will an autistic person ever become neurologically like an NT, the answer is no. Our neurology does not and cannot change in this way. This is why, it is so important that from birth, we are given the environment and support we need as children ( and adults) to develop in our normal autitic way. Just like NT children have the environment and support they need to grow up neurotypical.
What I learned in my 59 years of trying to be NT was that you can never change the neurological self. PERIOD! I could write a book about “the man in the mask” and how much I missed out on life because I would not let my true self live. This is why I so believe in what I’m saying. I’ve lived the lie. I lost a lifetime of being the real me. I’m trying to get that back now.
I also want to address this question as if the person is autitic and struggling with their traits. Trying to manage the stress, and anxiety of so many overwhelming feelings and thoughts, and situations. I would say your ability to understand your needs and limitations will make things easier to control. With time and age it will be more manageable.
This is such an important topic that stresses the need for autitic people to be their autistic best. To know their autistic needs and know how to manage their autistic challenges. But we also need a society that is supportive of our needs to. Environmental factors, procedural/ policy changes that are autistic friendly, for work, education, equal public access to goods and services.. etc. So that this person who is wanting to be “normal” CAN be normal. We cannot maintain our homeostasis, our needed balance in life, if everywhere we go we are thrown off balance.
This is the side of “being normal” that is so often overlooked. That a large part of our autistic struggle is not the autism, it is having no place to go where we can be autistic and stable. Its like trying to walk on black ice and faulting our sense of balance or ability to walk on who we are and not the circumstances. Autism is a turbocharged, full throttle life we live. All or our struggles are not “the autism” it is the results of not having the things we need to be our best autitic normal.
I hope this gives both NT and ND readers and the person that asked the question the KEY to understanding autism and our “autistic normal”.
Ok - going to give that poor soap-box a rest! :)
, mas está na minha lista de grandes ganhadores do Oscar. Ben-Hur é outro que eu tbm quero ver.
